The letter A stood for Admire in our A – Z of Love and now that we have returned to admiring our partner we can move on to the next letter in our Love Alpahabet.
Next in our A – Z of love is the letter B.
B could stand for beauty, besotted, bedazzled or believe but in order to keep love alive in our relationships B is going to stand for Balance.
Doesn’t sound very romantic does it but balance is so important in a strong relationship.
We must learn to balance our work and home life. If we become too involved with work then our partners will feel neglected.
If you have children you must find a balance between caring for your children and caring for your partner. Many partners feel excluded once children arrive and feel their emotional needs are not met.
It takes understanding and compromise to create a healthy balance in any relationship. Few loving relationships can survive living in each others pockets without feeling smothered but if we are too distant from our partner their emotional and physical needs are not being met.
We must balance our own sexual needs and our partners. Many people believe the frequency of their sexual relationship should be based purely on ‘when they are in the mood’ … why? What about your partners needs, find a balance that suits you both. Perhaps you have to accept a little less or more frequently than would be ideal for you but a relationship is not all about one person and what they want or need.
Write down a typical day on a sheet of paper and then add times next to it and whether your partner is involved, like this:
- work – 8 hours – No
- children (playing/homework) – 2 hours – No
- sleeping – 8 hours – No
- cooking/cleaning – 1.5 hours – No
- gym – 1 hour – No
- internet browsing – 0.5 hours – No
- television – 2 hours – Yes
- travel – 1 hour – No
Do this for a typical week and be honest. Do you eat together, share a hobby together or do homework with the children together?
It is a way to visualise the time you spend devoted to each other and each others needs. If you see you are not spending enough time with your partner then work out where you can make time for them.
Could you go to the gym together or miss a night and spend that hour with your partner, could you switch off the television and communicate with each other by doing an activity together or just talking about your week.
Some couples have an evening or day a week they spend together, basically they continue dating each other after they are married and it does help to keep the romance alive but it would be better to find a way of naturally spending time together without having to pencil it into your diaries.
So B is for balance in a relationship, keep the love alive in your relationship by finding a healthy balance.